“If you lived here, you’d be home by now.” — Firesign Theater
Yes, I’m home, homebound, socially distancing, not quite in a lockdown, not totally self-quarantining. I’m staying in, doing my civic duty to protect our community and to keep myself healthy. Do I get a Girl Scout Badge for that?
I’ve been socially distancing to some degree since February 28th when I was laid-off from my job which was eliminated due to a company reorganization. In the interim, I’ve conducted a job search, applied and received Unemployment Compensation, registered at the Department of Workforce Development (DWD) Job Center, and gratefully, interviewed for a couple of positions before the community spread of COVID-19 changed everything. I also had a few dates with friends for coffee and/or brunch. I delivered birthday cards to my niece Gemma and nephew Quinn. With their mother, my sister, Tami, we visited outside, 6-feet apart, and I elbow-bumped my brother-in-law, Ron. All that has now ended too.
My life outside of my home has temporarily been suspended like everyone else around the world. Tomorrow, will mark one week since I’ve socially-distanced for the exception of grocery shopping, the post office, and the credit union drive-thru. Oh, My!
Hello, I’m Linda, Ambivert
Gratefully, I’ve gained some experience in socially distancing by choice. I’ve lived alone for the past 12 years and have learned that to maintain some balance and serenity in my life, I need to periodically retreat to the hideout.
From the first in the series Dispatch from the Hideout, “Now, before I go any further, it’s important that I share with you that my hideout is a virtual one. I don’t have a cabin in the woods, or a bunker in the basement, I only have my home, a 645 square foot apartment. It’s where I wake up in the morning, retreat at the end of the work day, hideout on the weekends when I’m writing or feeling introverted, and end my days, often falling asleep on the couch watching TV. Yeah, I’m that girl. I live alone and most days I’m happy with that choice.”
The Hideout, or Map of My World During the Pandemic
Because I’m an ambivert, I have social needs. I’m a storyteller; I sometimes revel in being the center of attention. I have a history as the class clown and stand-up comedian. During a job interview recently, I was animated, I answered their questions, sometimes lost my way, told stories, adding sidebars and embellished details. I left thinking, “Did I overshare, did I talk too much?” Later, I received some feedback from the interview panel that I was a hit. Whew!
When I attended a brunch a week ago with friends who are a couple, at one point I apologized for dominating the conversation. It was as if I was making up for lost social connections and sharing as if it was my last opportunity to talk. Yikes!
Now, before I go any further, I want to state that I’m grateful. During this uncertain time, I have my health, a home that nurtures and protects me physically, emotionally, and spiritually, the love and affection of family and friends, unemployment compensation, health insurance, groceries to nourish me, books to read, and creative passions to pursue. I’m lucky.
However, there have already have been some casualties and sacrifices that I’ve had to make as a result of the pandemic. Our family had planned a 90th Birthday Party for our father following his April Fool’s Day Birthday. We reserved a banquet hall and invited 50 people, bio and chosen family, some who were traveling from Las Vegas, Colorado, and Kentucky. It’s now cancelled and will be rescheduled.
There was a period of uncertainty of whether it was on or off. We experienced some of the stages of grief, denial, sadness, and anger, but most of all we were disappointed. In the end, however, keeping Dad and Grandpa healthy is our number one priority. To his credit, as someone who can sometimes be intractable, as the family elder, he “went with the flow.” There are lessons to be learned in letting go.
As most of my family, friends, and readers know, I’m a cinephile. Every spring I take one of my two annual staycations and attend the Wisconsin Film Festival. This year, like many other athletic and special events, it’s cancelled.
Things change.
Lessons Learned
As a baby boomer and a person in recovery, I take a daily inventory and practice self-examination. Some critics may refer to it as navel-gazing, but when you live alone there are no other navels to explore!
One of my objectives during this period of social distancing was to create some kind of daily routine. By nature, I’m a creature of habit, so this would be a priority. As often happens in life, there are conscious and unconscious drivers to our behavior. To date this is how my daily routine has evolved:
Surviving the Pandemic Daily Schedule
- Wake up about at 3:00 or 4:00 a.m.
- (Wash hands a multitude of times throughout the day, applying Gold Bond Hand Lotion intermittently).
- Turn on CNN (which remains on most of the day).
- Make coffee about 4:00 a.m.
- Log on to my laptop.
- Start reading and posting on FB.
- Answer and send emails, or text.
- Make breakfast about 8:00 a.m.
- Check-off an item or two on my to-do list.
- Make lunch about noon.
- Take a nap.
- Log back onto my laptop.
- Respond to emails and/or comment on FB posts.
- Complete another item on my to-do list.
- Watch the White House COVID-19 Press Briefing.
- Post comments on Facebook regarding briefing.
- Watch the CBS Evening News, local and national.
- Switch back to CNN.
- Make dinner about 6:00 p.m.
- Watch Netflix, network TV, or, yes, you guessed it, more CNN.
- (Talk to myself throughout the day).
- Shower, brush teeth, assess whether I need to change pajamas.
- Review my day and plan the next day.
- Fall asleep to CNN.
- Repeat cycle.
Gratitude List
One of the things I’m most grateful during the pandemic is how our neighborhoods and communities have stepped up to create safety nets and new ways of protecting vulnerable people, workers, and businesses, as we impatiently wait for the Federal Government to deliver on their promises. To date their words and actions have not matched. They’ve consistently over-promised and under-delivered.
An area particularly important to me and my continued sobriety is how our recovery community has stepped up and created a virtual space using Zoom for 12-Step meetings and support. Hillary Clinton was correct, however you feel about her, and whether she was talking about raising children or other issues, “It takes a village.” Please reference the links below for more information on how to connect or reach out directly to me. Direct message me if you’d like an invite to a Facebook, AA during an Outbreak virtual recovery community.
For this blog, I’ve written about The Power of Circles (see link below). I’m grateful for the fellowship of the program and the many circles I’ve sat in throughout my life, whether feminist conscious-raising, 12-Step Recovery, peer-support, book clubs, death and dying, friendship circles and potlucks, creative collaborations, and of course the family traditions and celebrations that keep us connected.
Pretend It’s a Staycation
I’ve been enjoying the many ways people have shared their tools for surviving social-distancing and the pandemic, employing humor, hacks, and recipes for surviving the apocalypse. For myself I’m aware that balance is key. Though my Surviving the Pandemic Daily Schedule is skewed towards CNN, news, and time online, I seek out humor, satire, and the lighter (or Far Side) in social media whenever I need to.
Following this dispatch, I plan on cooking. I’ll make my mother’s comfort food recipe for American Chop Suey so I’ll have something to eat the next few days. I have more treats squirreled away than I probably need, however, want and desire are also important impulses to fulfill during the pandemic. Later, after the White House COVID-19 Briefing and a nap, I may watch Netflix or a pandemic-related movie.
Again, it’s all about balance and self-care. I will remind myself to not take myself too seriously, to be lighthearted. This weekend I’ll check-in with family and friends, take a walk (alone), a drive through the Arboretum on Sunday to keep the battery in my car charged, and take advantage of the virtual world to stay connected and keep my spirit nurtured.
Stay safe and healthy out there, campers! Has anyone seen Waldo?
Dispatch from the Hideout Series
To read the entire Dispatch from the Hideout Wisconsin Historical Society COVID-19 Journal from most recent to oldest (22 total installments), click link below:
Related Reading from Mixed Metaphors, Oh My!
The Pleasures (and Lessons) of a Staycation
Additional Reading on Social-Distancing During a Pandemic
5 Steps to Living with Uncertainty During Coronavirus
What Social Distancing Is Like for a Sober Person
Staying Sober Is a Whole New Challenge with Social Distancing
Here Are 18 of the Best Examples of Social Distancing During the Lockdown
Introverts, Extroverts and Social Distancing
Please Don’t Be Guilted Into Being More Productive During the Coronavirus
Content to Stream During a Pandemic
The Movies That Predicted An Outbreak Like Coronavirus