Awakening Desire

“…pleasure is not a ‘nice to have.’ It’s a ‘need to have. — from the Netflix series, The Principles of Pleasure.

During spring, my desires awaken. Like the earth defrosting in the warm sun from the extended daylight, I too unthaw and heat up, begin to have cravings and appetites that slumbered during our Midwestern winters. My senses are enhanced. I observe more couples outdoors in the neighborhood, taking romantic walks, holding hands, some with dogs and children in tow. Following is a poem that captures the itchy restlessness of spring fever. Continue reading

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A Filmgoer’s Guide to the Best Films of 2021

“The part about going to the movies that was so thrilling was not the film itself…but being around other humans, tearing up at the end and realizing that the people on either side of me were sniffling, too.” How Life Resumes, NTY, Melissa Kirsch, 2/19/22

Things change. As I write, the Academy Awards are a week away on Sunday, March 27. I usually post my annual, A Filmgoer’s Guide to the Best Films, well in advance of the Oscars. Since the event is approaching, the deadline for this review is here.

Award shows this year, those that didn’t cancel their in-person events, were delayed. The same was true of many of the films from 2021. Studios hoped people would feel safe enough to return to theaters in person so they postponed premieres. Most didn’t feel safe, including me. Continue reading

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The Road Forward: A Recovery Journey

Finding the Light in the Darkness

“Hope is being able to see that there is light despite all of the darkness.” – Desmond Tutu

Note: This article was originally written for and published in the March/April issue of Our Lives magazine, a look at the impact of the isolation of the past two years of the COVID-19 pandemic and a Wisconsin winter on our LGBTQ+ community. I drafted it in February. A link to the March/April issue of Our Lives follows the article.  

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Dispatch from the Hideout: Love in a Pandemic 2.0

Heard today: “I finally fell in love with my person.”

My realization: “My person, is me! 

Though the title of this Valentine’s Day holiday musing is Dispatch from the Hideout: Love in a Pandemic 2.0 it is actually the eve of the third year of the COVID-19 pandemic. Let that sink in for a moment.

Like most things in life, we can look at life from both sides now (cue the amazing Joni Mitchell). There’s pre-pandemic romantic love and our relationships with friends and family — compared to the past two years of love in a pandemic. It was a challenge and we each made an assessment — weighing the risks versus benefits — every time we made a decision of when, where, and how we’d get together in-person with friends, family, and loved ones with whom we didn’t live. When you live alone, the question became more powerful. How much isolation can my physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual well-being tolerate?    Continue reading

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My Love/Hate Relationship with Technology

“Life was much easier when apple and blackberry were just fruits.” — Ray Bradbury

First, let me share some background. I’m a baby boomer, a couple of days shy of my 72nd birthday. Let me begin, “Aging isn’t for sissies,” yet I’m grateful to be above ground. Hopefully, this information should provide some perspective on why I’m a late adopter and my love/hate relationship with technology. Continue reading

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Dispatch from the Hideout: Omicron Edition

“The year 2021 has been like a roller coaster. It was supposed to be the year the pandemic fizzled out. Instead, it was a year of intense whiplash.” — Julie Ries

“It’s not over, till it’s over!” — Yogi Bera

This dispatch is part holiday season review, 2021 year-end wrap up, plus a look ahead, and once again, an acceptance of opposing conditions, that things both change and remain the same. It has been a year characterized by both hope and despair, gratitude and grief, and resistance and surrender.

The past year — or 22 months — depending on how you want to count — we’ve been riding the coronacoaster of the COVID pandemic. There have been highs and lows on this ride, whiplash, and screams. We want to get off this ride, yet we can’t until it’s over. Continue reading

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The Legacy of Material Things

“We didn’t have much, but we had love.” ― Tyler Perry 

 “I’ve not always possessed what I’ve wanted, but I always received what I needed, and most days it was simply the love of friends and family, and the ability to live comfortably in my own skin.”  ―  From Mixed Metaphors, Oh My! Dispatch from the Hideout: Letter to Loved Ones

It’s that time of year when we celebrate the holidays, often the traditions of the generations that preceded us, the food we eat, the rituals we recreate, the stories we tell, and the memories we share. This is our legacy. It’s also that time of year when many of us look back and reflect on the year behind us and grieve our loved ones no longer present in life.

We inherit many things from our family, from our DNA to our shared lived experiences, both nature and nurture. We also inherit material things, bequeaths, mementos, and gifts from family, friends, and loved ones. They also represent a legacy. What creates a person’s legacy? Continue reading

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Thanksgiving: Things Change (Again, Again!)

“The only constant is change.” — Heraclitus

Things do not change; we change.” — Henry David Thoreau

From November 25, 2020…

As I write, it’s the Sunday before Thanksgiving. I’ve been rereading Thanksgiving Holiday journal entries from the past 12 years, plus my Thanksgiving blog reminiscences. A theme emerged which I’ve addressed before, yet continues to weave through my life — and the lives of loved ones — things change.

I begin this reminiscence and musing about the Thanksgiving holiday with the same quotes and sentiment from a year ago when COVID-19 was surging and many families and friends had to make the difficult decision of whether or not they would celebrate in-person, and how it might be different from the traditional holidays from the past. The only change in this introduction is I’ve been rereading 13 years of journal entries, and two years of Mixed Metaphors, Oh My! Thanksgiving: Things Change essays. Continue reading

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Words Matter III: New Words Bonus Edition

“To be sure, COVID-19 is unprecedented in wreaking havoc and destroying lives, but so is the overreliance on ‘unprecedented’ to frame things, so it has to go, too.” — LSSU Banished Words List committee members

“I know, right?” The irony is this popular statement of empathy or agreement was included in this year’s annual banished words list from Lake Superior State University. As things change, so does our lexicon evolve to reflect our culture.  Continue reading

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Funny, Not Funny!

 “When an idea first strikes you as funny, then you quickly realize its seriousness, and the funniness disappears, leaving you only with the feeling of how not funny it really is.” — Urban Dictionary

The past week there’s been a spotlight on Dave Chappelle’s new stand-up comedy performance, The Closer, streaming on Netflix. As a member of the LGBTQ+ community, I paid close attention to the early reviews and scathing criticism of his transphobic and misogynist material. At the suggestion of a friend whose humor I appreciate — which is often politically incorrect yet delivers a thought-provoking message — I decided to watch Chappelle’s The Closer. Continue reading

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