Tag Archives: Chosen Family

Feb 05 2024
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The Last Goodbye

We bid farewell to our father, grandfather, and great grandfather.

“Someday I’m going to write a book about our family!” — This writer as a defiant 16-year-old.

“I look forward to reading it!” — Our beloved mother

First, I haven’t drafted and posted new content for this blog since the end of October. The past three months have been a challenge and an unexpected journey. Though I’ve not written for my blog, I’ve done more writing during this period compared to what is typical. Most of it communication with bio and chosen family, journal entries, and social media posts. Continue reading →

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Sep 17 2023
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Meditations on Mortality: Grief & Gratitude

Meditation definition (Oxford Languages) – a written or spoken discourse expressing considered thoughts on a subject.

Mortality definition (Oxford Languages) – the state of being subject to death. 

“You don’t get to choose how you’re going to die, or when. You can only decide how you’re going to live.” — Joan Baez

As a person of a certain age — living my seventh decade — death and dying are on my mind.

Recently, there have been unexpected deaths of friends and loved ones, plus celebrities and artists in the public sphere, caused by accidents, deadly health crisis, unknown reasons, suicide, or overdose. When we’re unprepared for the sudden news, it’s both shocking and unsettling. For many of us, it’s a reminder of our own mortality. Continue reading →

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Jun 27 2023
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Posts

Fractured, Not Broken!

Fractured Definition: having a crack or break: having suffered a fracture

Broken Definition: (of a person) having given up all hope; despairing 

Resilient Definition: (of a person) able to withstand or recover quickly from difficult conditions

On Wednesday, May 17th, I accidentally fell forward while attending the Opioid, Stimulants, and Trauma Summit sponsored by the State of Wisconsin Department of Health Services at the Kalahari Resort and Conference Center in Wisconsin Dells and fractured the humerus of my right, dominant arm. Ouch! Continue reading →

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Apr 09 2023
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Poop Eggs, Orphan Holidays, Home Alone, & Gratitude

“For me, this holiday is a time for reflection, for renewing a spiritual connection, and for experiencing the hope and promise of the new beginnings of the spring season.” — An excerpt from my journal, Perfectly Flawed.

Leading up to Easter this year, I spent a lot of time reminiscing, rereading journal entries from holidays past and Easter-themed blog musings. Holidays, and the family rituals which we grew up with and the memories that remain, are mile markers of our journey in life. They provide a backdrop of the values and traditions of our ancestry and worship, the foundation of our beliefs. From childhood to adulthood, to this third chapter in my life, holiday traditions and rituals have evolved, some things nostalgically remain the same, others changed as I changed, and as the world changed. Continue reading →

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Jan 22 2023
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It Takes a Village: Lessons Learned

“We are all in this together.” ― Hillary Rodham Clinton, It Takes a Village

 “Accepting help is its own kind of strength.” ―  Kiera Cass

February will be the 10th Anniversary of my blog, Mixed Metaphors, Oh My! When I began designing it, I first needed to determine why I write. I saw it first as an extension of my journals, except I would invite others to read what I wrote. From the About section of the blog, Why I Write:

First, I consider myself a journalist, not the fact-checking, who, what, where, and when kind of reporter – but the gut-checking – why did this, or why is this happening to me or others and what can I learn from the experience – activist-essayist and memoirist. I keep journals, write memoirs and personal narratives as a record of my journey and exploration inward, allowing me to excavate and externalize aspects of my essence and experience, bringing them out of the shadows and into the light. Journaling and writing personal narratives is the process of first becoming aware, accepting and embracing what I have uncovered, followed by the charting of a new course. Continue reading →

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Oct 16 2022
Posts

Dispatch from the Hideout: Hip-a-Dee-Doo-Dah!

“Zip-a-dee-doo-dah, zip-a-dee-ay
My, oh, my, what a wonderful day
Plenty of sunshine headin’ my way
Zip-a-dee-doo-dah, zip-a-dee-ay!”

[Song composed by Allie Wrubel with lyrics by Ray Gilbert for the Disney 1946 live action and animated movie Song of the South, sung by James Baskett.]

First, I took some liberty with the happy song from my childhood for the title of this installment of the Dispatch from the Hideout series, to express optimism about the relief and restoration I hope to experience from my upcoming hip-replacement surgery.

A note about the movie that featured the song: It was considered by the NAACP as racist and released this statement, “…in an effort neither to offend audiences in the North or South, the production helps to perpetuate a dangerously glorified picture of slavery … [the film] unfortunately gives the impression of an idyllic master-slave relationship, which is a distortion of the facts.”  To read more about the film and the controversy it caused, Song of the South: 12 Things to Know About Disney’s Most Controversial Movie.

Continue reading →

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Feb 14 2022
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Dispatch from the Hideout: Love in a Pandemic 2.0

Heard today: “I finally fell in love with my person.”

My realization: “My person, is me!” 

Though the title of this Valentine’s Day holiday musing is Dispatch from the Hideout: Love in a Pandemic 2.0 it is actually the eve of the third year of the COVID-19 pandemic. Let that sink in for a moment.

Like most things in life, we can look at life from both sides now (cue the amazing Joni Mitchell). There’s pre-pandemic romantic love and our relationships with friends and family — compared to the past two years of love in a pandemic. It was a challenge and we each made an assessment — weighing the risks versus benefits — every time we made a decision of when, where, and how we’d get together in-person with friends, family, and loved ones with whom we didn’t live. When you live alone, the question became more powerful. How much isolation can my physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual well-being tolerate?    Continue reading →

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Dec 12 2021
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The Legacy of Material Things

“We didn’t have much, but we had love.” ― Tyler Perry 

 “I’ve not always possessed what I’ve wanted, but I always received what I needed, and most days it was simply the love of friends and family, and the ability to live comfortably in my own skin.”  ―  From Mixed Metaphors, Oh My! Dispatch from the Hideout: Letter to Loved Ones

It’s that time of year when we celebrate the holidays, often the traditions of the generations that preceded us, the food we eat, the rituals we recreate, the stories we tell, and the memories we share. This is our legacy. It’s also that time of year when many of us look back and reflect on the year behind us and grieve our loved ones no longer present in life.

We inherit many things from our family, from our DNA to our shared lived experiences, both nature and nurture. We also inherit material things, bequeaths, mementos, and gifts from family, friends, and loved ones. They also represent a legacy. What creates a person’s legacy? Continue reading →

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Nov 21 2021
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Thanksgiving: Things Change (Again, Again!)

“The only constant is change.” — Heraclitus

“Things do not change; we change.” — Henry David Thoreau

From November 25, 2020…

As I write, it’s the Sunday before Thanksgiving. I’ve been rereading Thanksgiving Holiday journal entries from the past 12 years, plus my Thanksgiving blog reminiscences. A theme emerged which I’ve addressed before, yet continues to weave through my life — and the lives of loved ones — things change.

I begin this reminiscence and musing about the Thanksgiving holiday with the same quotes and sentiment from a year ago when COVID-19 was surging and many families and friends had to make the difficult decision of whether or not they would celebrate in-person, and how it might be different from the traditional holidays from the past. The only change in this introduction is I’ve been rereading 13 years of journal entries, and two years of Mixed Metaphors, Oh My! Thanksgiving: Things Change essays. Continue reading →

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Oct 03 2021
Posts

Scenes from a Marriage: Keys to My Life

“Do you think people who live together can ever be completely honest?” — from Ingmar Bergman’s Scenes from a Marriage

Sometimes a series of events coalesce randomly, serendipitously. Such is the case this past month when I began watching the HBO remake of the groundbreaking relationship drama, Ingmar Bergman’s 1973 Swedish TV mini-series, Scenes from a Marriage. When it was originally released in 1973, I had been married for a couple of years to my husband, Frank. We watched the theatrical version released in theaters in the U.S. We were foreign and avant-garde film buffs. Our friend Hal, a French professor at UW – Parkside, curated the campus film society. We attended lots of films together and I learned about the art of filmmaking from Hal and I quickly became a cinephile. Continue reading →

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