Tag Archives: Death

Sep 27 2024
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Things Change

“There is nothing permanent except change.” — Heraclitus

“The only way to make sense out of change is to plunge into it, move with it, and join the dance.” —Alan Watts 

As a person of a certain age — my favorite euphemism for old —change is an undeniable truth of life. As I write, it’s the eve of autumn, the changing of the seasons, and the day before a memorial service for a coworker, confidant, and friend. Things Change has also been the theme of this year, and the title of my 17th annual journal, which begin in September. It’s also the final chapter of my life — no longer a dress rehearsal — yet an opportunity “To change the things I can” and leave a legacy behind, the measure of my life. Continue reading →

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Jul 14 2024
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Goodbye to Our Childhood Home

You Can’t Go Home Again — Title of the novel by Thomas Wolfe

“In life, a person will come and go from many homes. We may leave a house, a town, a room, but that does not mean those places leave us. Once entered, we never entirely depart the homes we make for ourselves in the world.” — Ari Berk

“The ache for home lives in all of us. The safe place where we can go as we are and not be questioned.” — Maya Angelou

Grief and gratitude, letting go and holding on, and things change have been themes for me this past year (and longer).

Note: This reminiscence was written in response to the prompt, Home, for my Door County Write On LGBTQ+ Writers’ Group.

Continue reading →

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Mar 23 2024
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The First Goodbye: Remembering Uncle Willy

“Carve your name on hearts, not tombstones. A legacy is etched into the minds of others and the stories they share about you.” ― Shannon Alder

“Some people, sweet and attractive, and strong and healthy, happen to die young. They are masters in disguise teaching us about impermanence. ― Dalai Lama

Today is St. Patrick’s Day as I begin drafting this reminiscence and tribute to my Uncle Willy. He was born William Roger Mason ― my mother’s favorite ―and beloved ― younger brother. Since I was child when I knew him, he will forever be remembered by his endearment, Uncle Willy. Continue reading →

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Feb 05 2024
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The Last Goodbye

We bid farewell to our father, grandfather, and great grandfather.

“Someday I’m going to write a book about our family!” — This writer as a defiant 16-year-old.

“I look forward to reading it!” — Our beloved mother

First, I haven’t drafted and posted new content for this blog since the end of October. The past three months have been a challenge and an unexpected journey. Though I’ve not written for my blog, I’ve done more writing during this period compared to what is typical. Most of it communication with bio and chosen family, journal entries, and social media posts. Continue reading →

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Sep 17 2023
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Meditations on Mortality: Grief & Gratitude

Meditation definition (Oxford Languages) – a written or spoken discourse expressing considered thoughts on a subject.

Mortality definition (Oxford Languages) – the state of being subject to death. 

“You don’t get to choose how you’re going to die, or when. You can only decide how you’re going to live.” — Joan Baez

As a person of a certain age — living my seventh decade — death and dying are on my mind.

Recently, there have been unexpected deaths of friends and loved ones, plus celebrities and artists in the public sphere, caused by accidents, deadly health crisis, unknown reasons, suicide, or overdose. When we’re unprepared for the sudden news, it’s both shocking and unsettling. For many of us, it’s a reminder of our own mortality. Continue reading →

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Apr 26 2023
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Dispatch from the Hideout: Casualties

“Life seems sometimes like nothing more than a series of losses, from beginning to end. That’s the given. How you respond to those losses, what you make of what’s left, that’s the part you have to make up as you go.” ― Katharine Weber

“Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don’t resist them; that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.” ― Laozi

This past Saturday night we planned an event, Last Night at the Hotel Bar, a reunion of sorts, a wake, and sendoff, not for a person but for a place, The Brink Lounge in Madison, Wisconsin. It was a gathering for Madison Indie Filmmakers, friends, and supporters. We referred to ourselves as the Barflies. The Brink Lounge was closing permanently on April 30. Continue reading →

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Apr 09 2023
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Poop Eggs, Orphan Holidays, Home Alone, & Gratitude

“For me, this holiday is a time for reflection, for renewing a spiritual connection, and for experiencing the hope and promise of the new beginnings of the spring season.” — An excerpt from my journal, Perfectly Flawed.

Leading up to Easter this year, I spent a lot of time reminiscing, rereading journal entries from holidays past and Easter-themed blog musings. Holidays, and the family rituals which we grew up with and the memories that remain, are mile markers of our journey in life. They provide a backdrop of the values and traditions of our ancestry and worship, the foundation of our beliefs. From childhood to adulthood, to this third chapter in my life, holiday traditions and rituals have evolved, some things nostalgically remain the same, others changed as I changed, and as the world changed. Continue reading →

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Feb 05 2023
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Celebrating a Decade of Mixed Metaphors, Oh My!

“Sometimes we become what we do. I became a writer by writing.”— Linda Lenzke, Blogger & More

“I write to discover what I know.” — Flannery O’Connor

Ten years ago in January, I took a WordPress class at Madison College. I decided that I wanted to take the next step as a writer: design, create, and launch a blog. I had been taking a series of reminiscence writing classes from a mentor and writing coach who would later become a friend and writing partner, Sarah White of First Person Productions. Prior to the classes, I had been writing for decades, poetry, spoken word monologues, stand-up comedy, and journaling for over 30 years. The reminiscence classes were a launchpad for my memoir, Perfectly Flawed, which I’m still writing, editing, and adding content as I live and write. Continue reading →

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Dec 06 2022
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Letter to Loved Ones (Just in Case)

“My life has not always been easy, but it’s always been worth the effort. I’ve not always possessed what I’ve wanted, but I always received what I needed, and most days it was simply the love of friends and family, and the ability to live comfortably in my own skin.” — from Dispatch from the Hideout: Letter to Loved Ones

For those who know me personally and/or read my blog or social media posts, I’m open and share freely about my personal life, some say I overshare. I write about my lived experience, often the mundane moments of everyday life, and sometimes I wax philosophically or poetically about our shared universal human experience. In essence, I’m an open book, and you choose whether to pick it up and read, or not! Continue reading →

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May 30 2022
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Childhood Report Cards: Snapshots of the Future

“There is always one moment in childhood when the door opens and lets the future in.” — Graham Greene

On April 1st my sister Tami, niece Gemma and I traveled to Racine to visit our father and Gemma’s grandfather to celebrate his April Fool’s Birthday. We told stories, reminisced about our shared past — updated each other on our current lives — and our plans for the future.

We shared stories about all the pranks our family played on Dad for his April Fool’s Birthday over the years. We updated each other on what’s happened since we saw or talked to each other last. Gemma talked about graduating from high school and her plans to attend the University of Wisconsin-Milwaukee in the fall.

Dad has been downsizing and purging items from our childhood home with the help of my siblings. He’s 92-years-old, uses a walker, and navigates the first floor of his home, and no longer uses the stairs to the basement and second story. Family members have been claiming items one last time from the basement and attic that we each want to keep, before the dumpster was scheduled to arrive later in April and our brother Rick and his crew of two helpers, would dispose of things that weren’t claimed or recycled. Continue reading →

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